


A mix of storms, cuddles and cartoons

by sunnylovesjeongin



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Age Play, Age Play Caregiver Bang Chan, Angst, ChanLix, Cuddles, Fluff, M/M, Non-Sexual Age Play, Polyamory, Tiny bit angsty, aussie line, but just a tad, caregivers!stray kids, especially chan, everyone loves felix, he's whipped, i'm soft for lix, sfw, stray kids - Freeform, stray kids are softies, then it's soft
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-28
Updated: 2018-12-01
Packaged: 2019-08-16 17:46:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,710
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16499909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunnylovesjeongin/pseuds/sunnylovesjeongin
Summary: Felix had tears pooling in his eyes, his whole body trembling as Chan gently started to play with Felix's hair, knowing that Felix always seemed to calm down when his hair was gently played with as it made him feel rather sleepy and relaxed. "Lix? Hey.. Hey... It's just a storm, angel..." Chan whispered softly in Felix's ear, kissing all over his hair, just wanting to stop his boyfriend getting so scared and panicky.A story in which Chan finds out his boyfriend, Felix, is a little, resulting in a lot of late night talks, cuddles and cartoons.





	1. Storms, nightmares and a brave knight

**Author's Note:**

> Okay hello!  
> So this is my first published work, I'm so sorry if there's obvious mistakes, I'm dumb and write in the middle of the night.  
> If you don't know what age regression is, in short, it's when someone regresses into a childlike headspace, often to deal with stress, past traumas or just because they enjoy it.  
> There will be talk of past trauma, not heavily, but it will be there, so please just stay safe, lovelies xxx

I am YOU promotions were stressing all of Stray Kids out. They were all completely exhausted, just needing a day away from cameras, fans, practice; now don't get me wrong, the boys adored meeting all the fans, performing for them, making them smile, but sometimes they just needed to relax, get away from all of it, even if it was just for a few precious hours. Their limbs were aching, throats sore, heads feeling like they were about to burst, and none of them could remember the last time they got a proper night's sleep.

 

All the members felt close to their breaking point, some more than others. This comeback, for some reason was stressing Felix out more than ever, and he just wanted to run away and hide from it all. He was lucky that he had his boyfriend, Chan next to him the entire time, because if he didn't, Felix was sure he would of reached his breaking point by now. Chan was always there, making sure Felix was eating, getting enough sleep, looking after himself. If Felix had any troubles or worries, Chan was always there to hold the younger's hand, reassure him and ground him. Chan was honestly the best boyfriend, friend and leader Felix could ask for. He was perfect. But as perfect as Chan was, he couldn't stop the fact that Felix was destined to break down at some point, the younger boy was going to burn out at some point. It was inevitable.

 

One of the main reasons Felix was so close to burning out, was the fact that he was focusing so much on keeping part of himself hidden from everyone. A part of himself which was so dear to his heart, and a rather large part of himself. The part of himself that stopped him getting so stressed and anxious that he couldn't see clearly, the part of him that was so carefree and pure. But it was also a part of him that not many people accepted. Some people would criticise it heavily, calling it paedophilic, disgusting, unhealthy, which was definitely not the case. It was a pure, harmless coming mechanism which helped Felix, more than anything else did. But the criticism, even though it wasn't aimed directly at him, still got to Felix; still made him feel gross and unclean, but still he couldn't abandon such a large part of himself completely. So he opted for the only other option. Keeping it hidden from everyone he loved, not wanting to deal with the judgemental glances, the whispering, the secret hatred. And he most importantly didn't want to lose any of his closest friends, especially not the one person on earth that meant so much to Felix. Chan. He was the one person Felix couldn't bare to see disappear.

 

You see, Felix was a little, or as some people prefer to call it, an age regressor. It was nothing harmful at all, it was simply Felix entering a child-like mindset for maybe a few hours to escape reality, almost. To escape from all his worries, stress and daily adult things. He would just sit in his room, wearing one of Chan's big, comfy hoodies, watching some random cartoon while cuddling up with some sweet stuffed animals, normally with his favourite stuffie, an old, brown teddy bear that he won at a fair when he was only nine years old. The teddy was called Cotton, but don't ask Felix why, he has no idea why nine year old him called his teddy Cotton, the name just seemed to stick. 

 

Felix normally had quite good control over his headspace, only ever slipping involuntarily when he was either super sleepy, or scared, and normally he would just become a bit clingier and more quiet if he was around the the other members, so they never really noticed or questioned it. They just made sure Felix went to bed shortly after he fell quiet, or that they were prepared for having to try and calm down a teary, scared boy. Every time there was a thunderstorm, each member was ready to cuddle an anxious, almost silent Australian, as they all knew that storms terrified the young boy, and they also knew that Felix would latch onto whoever was closest, until Chan came and scooped him up. None of them minded though. They all loved Felix, and they would much rather see the young rapper happy and calm, then terrified and teary, even if it did mean having a teenage boy fall asleep in their laps.

 

* * *

 

Normally Felix wouldn't fall asleep in his headspace, as if he did, Felix would most likely end up waking up still in his headspace, but today was an exception. Felix needed a little longer in order to de-stress, and most of the other members were out or busy. 3RACHA were busy at the studio, already working on creating new songs, Jeongin, Seungmin and Hyunjin were probably doing something cute and romantic together, and wouldn't end up bothering Felix, Woojin and Minho were already asleep and wouldn't wake up for a good few hours. So Felix had time for himself, able to cuddle up, colour, play, watch cartoons, anything his little heart decided. He could just be himself in this precious time he had all to himself. 

 

Once Felix was sure that no one was going to come in, he crept over to Chan's wardrobe, grabbing one of his boyfriend's warm, cuddly hoodies. As Felix was a bit shorter, Chan's hoodies were rather big and baggy on him, which was perfect for Felix. He could snuggle up and feel all nice and tiny, as if Chan was wrapping himself around the younger male. Once the boy had got comfortable and warm, he moved so he was sitting on the floor, getting out his favourite Paw Patrol colouring book (Felix had quite a few, he had been collecting them, wanting to see how many different ones he could complete) and just got started colouring, getting completely lost in his own little world, feeling his stress melt away as he brought the black and white Rocky to life. Once Felix was happy with the colouring of the little grey pup, he realised he was starting to getting a little bit sleepy. So making sure no one was out of their rooms, apart from Jeongin, Seungmin and Hyunjin who were all watching a movie, being all cuddly and cute, but they most likely wouldn't notice Felix creeping to the kitchen or bathroom. The young boy quickly filled up his water bottle, preferring to have his drinks in a closed cup when he was feeling smaller, as he could be a tad bit clumsy. Once he did that, he went to brush his teeth, rather proud of himself for that, as sometimes when Felix was in his headspace, he could forget to do the basic self care things. After all of that, the small boy climbed into the bed he and Chan shared, hugging Cotton to his chest, putting his favourite movie, Howl's Moving Castle, and letting himself drift off to sleep, feeling more calm than he had done in weeks.

 

Once Felix had fallen asleep, the weather started getting worse, the rain becoming heavier as the minutes went by, the wind getting stronger, making all sorts of freaky noises, the trees tapping on the glass, 3RACHA were finally heading home, huddling into the company van with muffled yawns and sleepy eyes. They tried to be quiet as they came home, as the dorm was pretty much silent apart from the quiet murmur of the television which the three lovebirds fell asleep watching. Chan smiled as he saw them all, quietly turning off the TV as he shooed the two younger rappers to bed, before going to check on his own lover. Chan felt guilty for leaving Felix alone so much, especially when the weather wasn't that good, as he knew the younger hated storms with a passion, but he couldn't do much about it, he needed to get the work done for their group. But seeing Felix asleep in his hoodies always made Chan's heart do somersaults, loving how pure and innocent his young boyfriend looked.

 

But unlike what Chan normally came home to, which was Felix cuddled up, looking extremely calm, today, the small boy was thrashing about nervously, still fast asleep, tiny whimpers escaping his lips. As soon as Chan saw this, he was of course thrown into worried boyfriend mode. He quickly crouched down next to their bed, gently running his fingers through Felix's soft, ginger hair, humming ever so softly to try and relax the younger male. "Hey, hey Lixie... Lix, wake up..." Chan murmured gently, ever so slightly shaking the smaller boy. As he did so, the small boy woke up with a tiny yelp, instantly latching onto the elder male, without saying anything.

 

Chan was a little bit taken aback, hugging the smaller boy tightly, rubbing at his back, kissing his forehead softly. "Shh... I've got you..." Chan murmured softly as the small boy clutched to him with a tiny whimper, Felix's small hands balling Chan's shirt up, refusing to let go.

 

 Felix had tears pooling in his eyes, his whole body trembling as Chan gently started to play with Felix's hair, knowing that Felix always seemed to calm down when his hair was gently played with as it made him feel rather sleepy and relaxed. "Lix? Hey.. Hey... It's just a storm, angel..." Chan whispered softly in Felix's ear, kissing all over his hair, just wanting to stop his boyfriend getting so scared and panicky. Seeing Felix all upset always hurt Chan, it felt like he was being stabbed in the heart, he just wanted to see his precious boy smile and giggle like normal, seeing his freckled cheeks covered with tears made Chan want to scoop the boy up and never let him go.

 

Eventually, the boy's sobbing subdued and he relaxed against the leader, hands clutched at Chan's shirt, soft sniffles coming from the boy every now and again, but other than that, he seemed a lot less frantic and scared. Despite his boyfriend now being calm, Chan was still worried out of his mind, just wanting to know what caused the younger Australian to panic and cry this much, as he wanted to know how he could fix it, make things better for his boyfriend. "Lixie, sweetheart..." Chan cooed softly, absent-mindedly playing with Felix's fluffy, ginger hair, "Why are you so worked up, huh?" Chan kept his words soft and simple, knowing that the other wouldn't be able to process a full blown discussion right now, as that's just how Felix was. If he was upset, he found it a bit harder to cope and process certain things. Chan was just glad he picked up on that little trait quickly, so he could always be there to go through things slowly and in English if his boyfriend needed him to. 

 

A few moments afterwards, Felix finally spoke up, his voice softer and more innocent than usual, sounding almost like a child's, "S-Storm... S-Scary... Nightmare... C-Channie..." Felix managed to get out, his words a bit jumbled, not forming full sentences, but Chan didn't mind. In fact, he found it quite sweet and endearing how innocent the boy was acting, he had a vague idea of what was going on, in the very back of his mind, but he decided that now most probably wasn't the best time to ask.

 

"Don't worry angel... The storm can't hurt you, neither can your nightmares... I'm here now, I'll protect you if you need me to." Chan smiled softly, still holding the smaller of the two close to him, rubbing his back soothingly. "I'll always be here to protect you, no matter what."

 

Chan's words seemingly managed to calm down the sniffling boy, causing him to look up at the elder with innocent, bright eyes, despite them being slightly red and puffy due to his crying session. "Channie p-protect Lixie..?" Felix asked softly, leaning against the elder, melting into his warm, stable arms. Those kind words from their leader was all it took to get the younger smiling again, as in both his headspaces, Felix trusted Chan completely no matter what.

 

Chan nodded at the question, gently leaning down to kiss Felix's tear stained cheeks with a soft hum. "Channie will protect Lixie, cause Channie's a brave brave knight!" Chan grinned, deciding to go with his gut instinct of babying Felix, treating him like a little kid. The younger seemed to react positively though, snuggling up against the leader's chest with a sleepy hum, his thumb gently resting in his mouth.

 

"Channie and brave knight..." Felix mumbled, his speech a tiny bit slurred due to how sleepy he was getting, which made Chan chuckle a little and pet the younger's hair, gently guiding him to lie down on the bed, pulling the duvet up so it covered them both.

 

"Sleep now, Lixie, okay? I'll be here to make all your nightmares disappear." Chan murmured to the already half asleep boy, smiling softly to himself as he stared at the beautiful boy in his arms. Letting out a gentle sigh, Chan gently got out his phone, starting to do a little bit of googling on one specific topic: age regression, something he would definitely have to talk to Felix about in the morning. 


	2. Secrets, stress and lots of cuddles

As soon as Felix woke up, he felt his heart drop, freezing as he looked over at his sleeping boyfriend next to him, remembering what had happened in the early hours of the morning. He felt humiliated and terrified that he could lose the one person he knew he really cared about, because of a stupid nightmare. The young boy prayed as hard as he could that Chan wouldn't remember, hoping the elder was too tired from working so hard to recall the night before. He just didn't want to deal with having to tell the other everything, honestly completely petrified that the elder would think it was weird or disgusting, that the elder would break up with him for it. And that was something Felix never ever wanted to happen. He loved Chan far too much to lose him, if Chan was weirded out by Felix's regression, then Felix wouldn't regress anymore. Simple as. At least that's what Felix told himself.

 

After about five minutes of frozen worrying, the younger of the two decided to try and weasel his way out of Chan's warm hold, just hoping it wouldn't wake his sleeping boyfriend. For two main reasons, one, he didn't want to deal with talking to Chan right now and two, their leader was finally getting some much needed sleep and Felix wasn't about to wake him from his peaceful slumber.

 

Once he was free from the bed, Felix hesitantly crept into the kitchen, glancing at the time quickly. 7:30. Normally, the dorm would be alive with exhausted boys, trying to find a missing sock, searching for coffee or food, or just whining about how it was far too early to go to practice. But, today was a very rare free day, so all the boys were using it as an opportunity to get the lie in they all deserved. But as much as he craved one, their was no way Felix would be able to sleep. His brain was going at a hundred miles an hour and he knew he wouldn't be able to relax until he was certain the elder didn't remember the night before.

 

"Morning Lixie." A soft voice sounded from  behind the younger boy, causing him to freeze.  Just his luck, Chan ended up waking up, which meant that if he remembered the night before, they were going to have to have a discussion about it. 

 

"Morning..." Felix murmured gently, feeling the elder snake his arms around his waist from behind, pulling him close. Felix couldn't help but melt against the elder, loving how warm and safe Chan's embrace always was. When Felix was cuddled up in Chan's arms, it felt as if all was right in the world, that nothing could harm him. "Did you sleep well?" Felix mumbled after a few moments of blissful silence.

 

 Chan smiled as he felt the other relax, noticing how tense he was at first, gently rubbing little circles on his hips. "Mhmm, I did, sweetheart... How about you?" Chan whispered, kissing the boy's messy hair softly, the gentle smile never leaving his lips. Felix had that affect on the elder, he could make Chan smile for hours on end, by just being his cute, precious self. .

 

"Mm... Yeah..." Felix mumbled, thinking that Chan didn't remember, finally relaxing completely, leaning his head back to properly look at the elder with big doe eyes, smiling sweetly. "You don't need to go to the studio tonight, do you?" Felix asked with a hum, wanting to spend the day with the elder just cuddled up on the sofa watching movies, not wanting to worry or stress about anything. Even if it was just for one day.

 

Chan shook his head sweetly, gently massaging the boy's scalp with his fingers, humming softly. "No, not tonight... Today is about nothing but cuddles." Chan smiled softly, knowing exactly how to make his boyfriend happy. "But, Lixie... Before us making breakfast and watching a movie... Can I talk to you?"

 

Those words were all it took to make Felix freeze, tensing up in Chan's arms. Even if you weren't hiding anything, that is such a stressful request, especially from the person you loved most in the world and couldn't bare to lose. The smaller of the two slowly pulled away so he could properly face the elder, trying to hide his panic, hoping to everything holy that it wasn't what Felix thought it was about. "Of course, you can always talk to me..." Felix murmured, it coming out no louder than a whisper, the boy leaning against the counter anxiously.

 

"It's about last night, Lixie," Chan instantly spotted how tense the younger became, gently taking Felix's small hands in his own, squeezing them gently. "Don't get all stressed and panicky, okay? There's absolutely nothing to get stressed about. I just want to understand it, okay?" Chan whispered, smiling kindly at Felix, not wanting the other to panic at all. "Think you could explain why you acted so child like last night for me? I have an idea, and I'm not going to judge you at all."

 

Those few words were all it took for Felix to know that he could trust Chan completely. But that didn't make this any less terrifying in the slightest. Having to come clean about the one thing you were terrified about people finding out, that was petrifying. It took Felix a few moments to speak, trying to ignore the lump in his throat and the tightening in his chest, but Chan didn't mind. He knew that if he pressured the younger Australian, he would just shut down and wouldn't tell Chan anything. If Felix was going to talk to him, he would have to wait until Felix could explain how he wanted to. "Have you ever heard of age regression, Channie..?" Felix finally murmured, refusing to look up at the elder, shaking like a leaf.

 

Chan couldn't help but smile, glad that his younger boyfriend was finally opening up to him, letting him into part of his world, a part he kept so hidden from everyone else. It made Chan feel loved and special if he was being honest. "I think so, it's where someone regresses to a childlike state of mind in order to cope with stuff?" Chan asked softly, honestly not one hundred percent certain on the ins and outs of it, but he was more than willing for learn, especially for Felix of all people.

 

"Pretty much... Some people use it to deal with stress, others just because its a part of them, or for fun. Then there's people like me who use it to deal with childhood trauma..." Felix mumbled the last part, chewing on his lip harshly. "You're basically in the state of mind of a child, it's purely innocent... But some people think it's weird and gross and you probably do and god I'm disgusting, I can't believe I'm actually telling you about something so fucking wrong." Felix suddenly exploded, eyes going wide, hands trembling, breath catching in his throat. Talking about this out loud terrified the younger, thinking it sounded so wrong and disgusting to the other, and that was Felix's worst nightmare.

 

His boyfriend's sudden outburst worried Chan to no end, sensing the boy was nearing a panic attack the leader slowly lowered the boy nearer the floor, squeezing his hands softly. "Hey, Lixie, sweetheart... Take a deep breath for me, everything's okay. Everything's fine, I promise you. You are not disgusting. You are not gross. You are beautiful. You are perfect and nothing is ever going to stop me loving you, okay?" Chan murmured gently, keeping very calm and collected, his words simple and straightforward, not wanting Felix to get overwhelmed, as that would make this about a million times harder for both of them.

 

Felix clutched onto Chan's hands tightly, his chest rising and falling rapidly as he stared at the elder, his eyes wide, filled with panic and fear. "B-But..." The boy started, his voice soft and scared, fresh tears falling down his cheeks as Chan shook his head.

 

"No buts, Lixie. No buts, okay?" Chan murmured, playing with Felix's hair calmly, trying his hardest to keep the young boy smiling and happy.  "Lixie, I want you to listen to me, okay? Can you do that for me?" Chan asked softly, feeling relieved as the young Australian nodded hesitantly. "There's a good boy. I do not think this is weird, gross or anything like that, okay? In fact, I pretty much think the opposite, I find it rather cute, precious and interesting. If you need it to help cope with stress, your feelings, past trauma, any thing like that, then you need it. I'm not going to take it away, Lixie, I promise." Chan whispered softly, gently wiping the boy's tears, smiling kindly at him.

 

Once Chan's kind, comforting words sunk in, Felix obviously started to relax a little bit more, leaning into his boyfriend, hesitantly at first, but then suddenly. Chan happily scooped the boy into his arms, whispering sweet nothings as he did so, just wanting his precious boyfriend to be comfortable. "L-Love you..." The smaller of the two mumbled as he was cuddled up, face buried in the crook of Chan's neck, the elder providing the warmth and stability he so desperately craved.

 

"I love you too angel." Chan hummed softly, stroking the boy's hair softly with a sigh. "I'm gonna pick you up now, Lixie, okay? You can cuddle up on the sofa with a blanket while I make you some hot chocolate and breakfast, okay? You need to relax for a moment." Chan hummed, gently lifting the small boy, finding it a bit easier than it should be, but that was probably just because they had a comeback coming up, all the member's had been put on diets, even those who were verging on being underweight, such as Felix. The smaller let out a soft whine in response to being moved, but quickly relaxed, wrapping himself around Chan completely, not wanting to lose the warmth and safety the other provided so easily.

 

Once the young Australian was happily situated, cuddled up under numerous blankets, watching some random cartoon, well, Chan thought it was random but it was actually Felix's favourite, The Powerpuff Girls', Chan disappeared into the kitchen, making a coffee for himself, smiling through at his sleepy, now slightly calmer boyfriend. It was default for Chan to put on cartoons when Felix was worked up, they always seemed to calm him down, Chan always thinking that it was simply due to them being very easy to follow and not too overwhelming for the boy to process, but now he could see that it could also be they helped the boy to slip into a more relaxed state, which was simply adorable. Once he had finished admiring his boyfriend, he focused on getting their breakfast ready, hot chocolate and cereal for Felix, coffee and cereal for Chan. 

 

Felix looked up with red, puffy eyes as Chan walked in with the food, smiling sheepishly. "I'm sorry for freaking out on you, Channie... It was just scary... I... I'm ready to talk about it if you want..." The boy offered shyly, and honestly, that was enough to make Chan's day, so happy that the boy was willing to actually open up and talk about something so personal and nerve racking for him.

 

"I would love that, Lixie, I honestly would... If I ask anything you're uncomfortable with, just tell me and you don't have to answer anything you don't want to, okay?" Chan murmured, smiling as Felix offered him a tiny nod, cuddling up into the blanket, which Chan took as a sign to ask away, so he did. "I'll start with the basics... How long have you been regressing, Lixie?"

 

The younger of the two thought for a moment before answering, chewing on his lip. "Well... I've always have been a childish person, sometimes more childish than other times... I used to just lock myself away in my room when things got too much for me and just colour, watch cartoons and stuff like that, but I didn't realise it was called regression... After the whole incident when I was fifteen, I was looking up ways with how to cope with certain things... And I came across a page talking about age regression or little space as some people call it, and I realised I already subconsciously regressed... So I've known roughly three years ago now..."

 

By the end of Felix's answer, Chan had his brows furrowed, clearly a little worried about something. "Lix, you don't have to answer, but what happened when you were fifteen?"

 

Felix bit his lip, debating in his head if he wanted to talk about it, after he swore to himself never to even mention it again, but Chan just wanted to know so he could help Felix, because he loved him, he wasn't going to use this against him, surely. "I was... I was kidnapped... I don't want to talk a lot about it... But ever since then, I've found it hard to cope with a lot going on at once, as it reminds me of those few days I spent unable to know what was going on, not being able to understand what was going to happen... I should've told you... But I just couldn't.." The boy was shaking a little, which prompted Chan to climb onto the sofa, wrapping the boy up in his arms.

 

"I understand why you didn't tell us, baby... But just know, I'll never let anything like that happen again." Chan reassured his still nervous boyfriend, starting to move onto lighter topics, curious about his boyfriend's younger side. The two talked for about an hour, until the other member's started to wake up, creeping into the sitting room to see the two love bird's cuddled up, having a discussion they could only catch very few spinets of. Chan found out so much, such as Felix is normally in the mindset of a three to five year old when he regresses, his favourite thing to do is have tea parties or colour, he likes wearing Chan's hoodies when he feels small, he doesn't have that long of an attention span, and he normally slips when there's a storm or he's super sleepy.

 

There was one final question Chan had for the other: would he ever be allowed to Felix in his headspace? When asked, Felix nodded shyly, explaining that now Chan knew, he would feel a lot more comfortable just coming and climbing on Chan's lap, instead of hiding himself away. When he heard that, Chan never felt more blessed that his boyfriend loved and trusted him that much.


End file.
